I missed a couple of days going to the gym last week. I thought, "That's OK I'll make it up this week by working out extra hard." For Mother's Day I got the mp3 I needed (ok wanted)to work out with and a couple of workout outfits with a water bottle. Yeah! I couldn't wait to use them Monday morning...but I set the alarm for 4:45 PM instead of AM accidentally.

OK, well....we'll make up for it by going every day for the rest of the week I tell my gym partner.

Then last night Cecil says I can't go because he needs to go to work early. So, being the good submissive wife that I am I set my alarm for 4:45 AM anyway. I was convinced that he wouldn't really get up early and even more determined that I would go to the gym anyway.

Apparently I matured over night or some such wisdom hit me and the reality that I couldn't go to the gym if my husband said, "no" sank in. So, I turned the alarm off at the very first buzz this morning. But I hadn't grown up that much because I waited a few minutes then rolled over and asked my husband if he was getting up. (In my mind I'm thinking "if he says no I still have time to get ready to go.") He mumbles, "yes" but rolls over and continues sleeping.

OK, I'm quickly losing this being a good submissive wife battle. Then I think to myself... "well whether I go or not I still could get up and get my bath. But... Then I realized that if he really does get up I would have used up all the hot water and slowed him down in getting ready for work. He needs a bath before me. So, good sacrificing wife that I am I get up and run him a tub of water. I then nicely go in and tell him his bath is ready. BTW At this point I had already sent a message to my gym partner that I couldn't go today and she had promptly went back to bed...so my plans were already shot. "What time is it?" he asks. "5:30", I announce proudly. (See what I good wife I am..getting up early and running bath water for my husband..and helping get up and off to work early like he wanted to?) "I'm too tired, I've got to get some more sleep." "ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?" (I said in my head because I'm way too good of a submissive wife to say that out loud.)

OH, no no this wouldn't do. I was up and awake when I hate mornings. My plans were ruined and this man ruined them for his plans and now he was not getting up! So, being the good submissive wife that I am I decided to cook breakfast. Loudly cook breakfast. (our room is right off the kitchen) Then I woke my son up. (he did say he liked it when I went to the gym because I got him up early which meant he finished school early) But as an added bonus...he also has never learned to whisper and walks through the house with all the stealth and quiet of a baby elephant. Can I help it if he is loud and he might just might disturb my sleeping husband? After all I'm just being a good wife and cooking breakfast. (forget the fact that I hate mornings and never ever cook breakfast)

So, my ds eats and announces he is going back to bed. So much for that idea. Meanwhile dh still hasn't budged from bed. I went in and announced your breakfast is ready. Two eggs, bacon, toast, and coffee. Who could deny I'm a great wife? Bath ran and breakfast cooked. Yes, I'm a wonder. Do you know what he says to me? I'm going to email my boss and tell him I've got to come in late today to take care of a situation that came up. "NO FREAKIN' WAY YOU JUST DID THIS TO ME!" (again I think but don't say because I'm way too good of a submissive wife to say such a thing out loud.) Now, fact is there is a situation that needs to be dealt with but I had no idea he had decided to take care of it THIS morning and since he did in fact decide to take care of it THIS very morning (but no where near the time I actually go to the gym) THEN WHY EXACTLY COULD I NOT GO TO THE GYM?

So, he sends said email and goes right back to bed without eating my scrumptious breakfast. I ate my breakfast not at the dining room table but at my computer in the bed room. (oops I hope it didn't disturb his sleep) Being the good wife that I am when I noticed him shivering (because I had removed the comforter from the bed and turned up the AC to freezing) I got a blanket out of the hope chest and put over them. I then went to get in the bath that I had ran for him.

While in the bath I thought well if he is not going in until later then may be R and I can still go to the gym before her dh has to go into his job. But alas, she went back to bed and I couldn't reach her. So, it is just me up stewing while the rest of the world sleeps. I've already had breakfast, a pot of coffee, and bathed & dressed with no place to go.

So, I decided to do Bible study while I had this quiet time. What did the Lord say to me this morning?

"with all lowliness and gentleness, with long suffering, bearing with one another in love, endeavoring to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace."
Ephesians 4:2,3

"Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, put on tender mercies, kindness, humility, meekness, long suffering; bearing with on another, and forgiving one another, if anyone has a complaint against another; even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do."
Colossians 3: 11,12

Lowliness? Gentleness? Long suffering? Tender mercies? Kindness, humility, meekness, forgiveness? I displayed those traits this morning, right? OK No. I really fail the submissive 101 class on a regular basis. Good thing Cecil is aces at the whole long suffering thing or we would be in a world of hurt as a couple.

But Dog gone! Have you ever noticed that God has a way of telling you exactly what you need to hear exactly when you don't really want to hear it? *sigh* OH, well I guess I have to listen. I mean He is God and all........

Well, I just cleaned the toilet. Yes, the toilet the Lucifer of all housewife chores. The next one running a close second being is the fridge/freezer and the scary stuff that accumulates at the bottom under the crispers. Of course as I scrubbed and sanitized I did as I always do and mentally ranted at the unfairness of it all. I mean really, why do I have to be the one to clean the toilet? I sit down. I have wonderful aim from that vantage point. Everything just goes straight down. It's those others. Those other no aim having throne vistors. They spend countless hours in their life times working on their aims with sports and video games. Here is a hint for them folks. AIM at the FRIGGIN' water in the middle! If you are so handicapped that this is beyond you then you should have to clean this mess not me.

Then it hit me. I could make a bundle on toilets that self clean...no no wait... toilets that give the bad aimers a little zap. Yes, one drop on the pot outta place and it gives you back a little shock. I mean really, men spend a fortune on gadgets to improve their golf swings and what not... why not something to improve their toilet aims? Tell them it is a sport and they'll love it. I personally think it's a fabulous idea. When you see it on QVC for $19.99 remember I thought of it first.

Ya know it's gonna happen. We bought a enclosure that is supposed to keep the kids from falling off. But what happens they don't zip up the door? Off goes Em right through the opening. She is fine. I thought for a while that I was gonna have to give Daddy CPR after he saw his little angel fly off and land directly on her neck. They both survived. Imagine that?


.

Last Saturday the kids checked out soooo many books that I didn't bother to check one out myself. I figured that I'd be too busy reading out loud to them to enjoy a book for my own. HUGE mistake. The second you don't have a book you crave nothing so desperately as to have a book. On top of that I started feeling sick...what do you do when your sick? Read! And it has been raining...what do you do when it rains? Oh, surely you get my point by now.

So, after I dragged myself out of the house and sacrificed my own comfort for my son (am I playing it up enough?) so he could play soccer on Wednesday, I decided to make a detour by the library and pick up myself a book. Emily (the girl who doesn't like books) surprisingly had gone through all of hers so she got some more too. So here is what we have now.

Brandon's Books: Rechecked out the books he got on Sat.

Emily's Books:
Are you my Mommy (tab and texture book)
Amelia Bedelia and The Surprise Shower by Peggy Parish
Paddington's Garden by Michael Bond
Milly and Tilly by Kate Summers
Curious George and The Pizzaby Marget and H.A. Rey's
Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day
by Judith Viorst
Make Way for Dumb Bunnies by Sue Denim
(Oh Lord how did she sneak that in?)
Alexander and The Magic Mouse by Martha Sanders
A Giraffe and a Half by Shel Silverstein
On the First Day of Grade School by Emily Brenner
The Pain and the Great One by Judy Blume
Franklin Plays the Game by Paulette Bourgeois and Brenda Clark

April's Books:
Firethorn by Sarah Micklem
Flight of the Night Hawks by Raymond E. Feist
The Historian by Elizabeth Kostova

My husband usually comes home each evening and tells me all about his work day. Sometimes it sounds like the day before. In those cases, I tend to nod every now and then, while tuning in and out, paying just enough attention to not be completely ignoring him. Then if he happens to say something interesting I can then fully tune him back in.

The other day I had him tuned in because his company had their yearly
awards ceremony and he was telling me who won what award..
"Keith won Technical Excellence, Syringes was Cell Of The Year.... "
So, I interrupt
(interrupting people who are speaking is a wonderful habit I have)
"Who won for Administrative Excellence?" I ask.
He then goes on and on about how Keith really deserved the Technical Excellence award and how he is glad he won.
Yes, yes, Keith is a great guy, works hard and all that but.....
"Who won the Administrative Excellence Award?"
Then he goes on about the meeting that he had to go to before the Awards.
OK.... yea, I get it, I know you hate meetings..... but
"Who won the Administrative Excellence Award?"
Finally he goes, "Oh, well, I did." all dull like the whole thing bored him!

To my knowledge he is the only employee to win that award TWICE. My husband tends to be both a private and very humble man. I guess there is always the possibility that he just didn't think his achievement was important. But the more I stewed on it (stewing is another fine talent I have) the more it bugged me. If I had never pressed him would he have mentioned that he'd won? This is soooo classic Cecil. He can talk all day long about work but talk about himself? Are you kiddin'???

Then it hit me...... wait a minute.... don't those awards come with some cash? Not a lot.. but enough to show a little appreciation? Now, I get it. He wasn't trying to hide he won an award plaque. (In fact he then pulled it out to show the kids) He just wasn't wanting to tell me he won money.

Right before mother's day too! How convenient! Now, why would that dear sweet man be wanting to keep that kind of information from his clothes loving, gym membership craving, curriculum addicted, needing a new hair style, loyal and adoring wife?

Just kidding, honey! Congrats on the Administrative Excellence Award. Lord knows you deserve it! I'm very proud of you. Now.....

Now that you have won the stinkin' award (again).....


STOP WORKING SO FRIGGIN' MUCH!!!!!

The pain, the horror, the snot, the sore throat, the puffy watery eyes, the gasping for air, the lack of flavor, the raw sinus's, the tender nose, the sneezing, the weird pressure in your ears, the sniffling, the trying desperately to breath out your nose, the generally yucky feeling of a head COLD.


Why?!?

OH,why me?!?

Why must I suffer so?!?

What did I ever do to deserve this?

Does anyone really expect me to function like this?

Oh, what a cold cruel world!!!

Em: "Mommy"

Em: "Mommy"

Em: "Mommy"

Mom: "What Emily!" (in really snappy, irritated, why on earth are you bugging me Mommy voice)

Em: "Mommy, how do you spell LOVE?"

Note: In her hands are a pencil and a little slip of paper with the word Mommy already carefully written on it.....

Mom: "L - O - V - E" (in much softer, isn't she so precious, aren't I ashamed of myself voice)


Some times being a Mommy is rather humbling....


.

I slept the weekend away. Every time I do this my hubby thinks something is horribly wrong with me. He could never sleep off and on all day and night no matter desperately he wanted or needed to. I however have always been able to simply sleep through illnesses. This time, although, yes... my allergies are evil, it was more this humid heat. I've been determined not to start turning on our AC until it was unbearable due to the high electric bill we already struggle to pay. I have no idea what the temperature hit this weekend (not really that high I don't think) but I was so lethargic. The humidity just made me sticky at all times and it was like breathing under water. Every time I got still I fell asleep. I Know, I Know, I'm such a wimp! Last night I lost the AC battle. I wasn't going to sleep another miserable sticky night. I turned to AC on...oh great bill payer that sleeps beside me please forgive me. (He didn't seem to mind sleeping in a comfy 72 degree room either.)

During my waking hours on Saturday, I did run the kids to the library. Brandon and I had finished Redwall and he was dying to get the second book in the series Mattimeo. Edited to point out that Mossflower is the second book and we accidentally got the third book in the series. opps (BTW absolutely loved loved loved Redwall!!! CAUTION: the battle scenes are a bit violent for little readers.) Emily declared she didn't want to go, but I took her any way and she ended up bringing home a ton of books. I questioned her about it and she declared, "Well, What? I changed my mind!" Yes, she is my girl!

Let's see Brandon got:
Mattimeo by Brian Jacques
The Stink Files: The Postman Always Brings Mice by Holm and Hamel
Riddles, Riddles, Riddles selected by Joseph Leeming
Pirates & Smugglers by Moira Butterfield (Kingfisher)
Pirate by Richard Platt (Eyewitness)
Pirates & Treasure by Saviour Pirotta (The Remarkable World)


Note: Brandon has decided he wants to study pirates.

And Emily got:
Milo and the Magical Stones by Marcus Pfister
Milo and the Mysterious Island by Marcus Pfister
Mama Don't Allow by Thacher Hurd
Bedtime for Frances by Russell Hoban
Once upon a Time, the End (asleep in 6o seconds)
by Geoffrey Kloske & Barry Blitt
If You Take a Mouse to the Movies by Laura Numeroff
Dancing with the Wind by Stanton Orser
Sweet Strawberries by Phyllis Naylor
Slugs in Love by Susan Pearson
The Ugly Duckling adapted by Jerry Pinkney
Oliva and the Missing Toy by Ian Falconer

During my waking hours on Sunday we discovered the dogs were covered in fleas. Man, I hate when the fleas come. Off to Petsmart. So we bathed the dogs, medicated dogs, sprayed dogs, sprinkled powder carpet and dog bedding, and sprayed yard. Plus, it is a well known fact that if dogs have fleas they have worms. So, I wormed the dogs.

PS I don't think my dogs love me anymore.

Who'd a thought it. I've made it through another week of waking up at 5 AM to go to the gym. If anyone doubts my sincerity about losing weight they need to go no farther than the very hour at which I have dragged out of bed these last two weeks. Right now I have to ponder how much longer my hubby will continue to tolerate me going at $5 a pop 3X a week. How long will I need to do this before he gives in and believes I'm serious and buys me a gym membership?

I must say I love going to the gym. I love the machines and the TV on the wall. I love the burst of energy. I love not sitting around the house thinking how fat I am and what I a worthless lump I am for not doing anything about. I love the sense of accomplishment. I love being there with my friend. I love giggling about creepy workout guy. I love realizing I can push myself just a little more. I love being able to say I go to a gym. I love coming home wide awake at 7 AM ready to attack the day's work. I love waking up my kids when I get home and spending some fun time with them before we start school and house work. BTW if you happen to read this dear sweet hubby of mine I would love all this all the more with a good ipod so I can jam while I work out .....hmmm...may be I should get the gym membership past him first...

As much as I'm enjoying going to the gym, I will say I did suffer a huge blow this week when I finally got around to getting on the scales and realized that I actually weigh nearly 10 pounds more than I thought I did! You mean I didn't think lowly enough about myself yet? I'm even bigger than I thought? Scales are cold, cruel, evil things. That's OK my resolve is digging in for the long haul.